Have you ever come across people that seem to be able to keep to diets or manage to get to the gym 3-4 times per week without any effort at all? Do you struggle and look at these people, wondering what is their secret? The only difference between them and you is how they feel about diet and exercise and themselves. Ask yourself the following questions:
- Do you ever tell yourself that exercise is hard work and a chore?
- Do you tell yourself and others about how you can never keep to a diet?
- Do you tell yourself that you are weak and have no willpower?
- Do you attempt lots of diets, fail and then tell yourself the same thing will happen every time you try?
- Do you never have clear, realistic goals that you tell yourself you will achieve?
- Do you ever feel ugly?
If you have answered yes to any of these questions, you could well be programming yourself to fail by telling yourself in advance that you will. Many psychologists now believe that the subconscious mind works silently towards 'making' an outcome happen. If you tell yourself that the outcome will be negative and that you are ugly, your subconscious will begin to work towards making it happen! You may find yourself taking less time over your appearance, missing visits to the gym and finding that you can't resist that extra piece of chocolate. It can become a vicious circle, as you continue to tell yourself how weak you are at each failure, making a negative outcome even more likely. NLP experts advise that to make the biggest changes, think of things that you want to happen in the 'present tense' as if they have already happened. They believe this kick starts the subconscious into taking action. Some psychologists even believe that your thoughts can alter your physiological state. If this sounds too far-fetched, think about how depressed people can become ill, or how some people can rapidly become ill after their elderly partner dies.
There are many famous supporters of NLP including Geri Halliwell who is reported to have made a 'Cosmic Shopping List' of her goals in the present tense before she became famous. Nearly all of the goals on her list have since become true.
So how do you get out of that vicious circle and change your thoughts and behaviour? Try the following:
- Make your own 'Cosmic Shopping List' by listing the things about yourself and your life you want to achieve. Make sure you make them specific and in the present tense e.g. don't write 'get a better paid job', instead write 'I earn £X per year'. Or rather than writing 'lose weight', write 'I weigh X pounds' or 'I wear X size clothes". Your subconscious needs to know exactly what you want to make it happen!
- Begin to tell yourself positive things about yourself and your attitude to life. Each morning say "I look great" out loud to yourself in the mirror.
- Change your language about things to the positive. Instead of saying, "I can never diet", say "this small set-back won't stop me achieving my weight goals".
- Never put yourself down, either to yourself or others. And make sure that others are aware that you will not accept them putting you down. You will be amazed at how quickly you will begin to feel better about yourself, and others will begin to respect you more too.
- Tell yourself that you enjoy exercise and healthy eating. Even if you don't enjoy them now, you may begin to enjoy them. Telling yourself constantly that you hate them can only make you hate them more!
